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Duck Duck Go
Die damnit! (Audio Tape)
So there is a documentary being done on "Cassette Tapes" aptly titled "CASSETTE: A DOCUMENTARY" which baffles me. The Kick Starter trailer starts of by listing most (but not all) the reasons why I hated tapes which is a bit like starting off a infomercial with why the product isn't worth your money or consideration. However loved or hated these things were I think it's fool hardy and almost if not completely idiotic bands are releasing on Cassette Tape anymore but it's not some off the cuff opinion, it's something I've given a lot of thought to over the years with a lot of focus on the future. [ continue ]
Jan. 27th, 201288 views0 Comments

Porn Craft THAT IS ALL!
Will I get off my ass and write something serious? Only time will tell but for now all I have is this moment of silliness for those who play Mine Craft style games... [ continue ]
Jan. 26th, 201268 views0 Comments

Tim Hortons TP
So the other day I'm in the mall, I've got a coffee, I'm sipping on a comfy chair talking to a few people in my netbook and my body lets me know it's time to poop! So I quickly pack up and make for the bathroom and luckily with the mall flooded with Christmas shoppers it's free! Sadly this isn't as fortuitous as I thought as soon I'll find out there is a dark secret lurking in this bathroom! [ continue ]
Dec. 19th, 2011161 views0 Comments

The Sad State of Live Metal
The state of live Metal performance seems to be at an all time high for “stupidity.” The other night myself and my band mates went to a concert and it begged the question “Is this what metal has come to?”; insults, lack of appreciation, irony (not the good kind) and flat out ignorance?! Live Metal performance is in danger of being a display if ignorant overly macho self denied homo-eroticism. [ continue ]
Dec. 5th, 2011222 views0 Comments

The Super Sexy Double Life of Dirty Words (Pillow Talk)
As the last few people left the kitchen Mary stood facing the fridge coyly reading the notes and looking at the pictures that adorn it. She could feel Dan moving closer, the room filled with tension. A smirk just before he put his right arm around her waist and his left up her shirt aggressively mauling her breast and pushing her hard into the fridge. As Mary feigned surprise he kissed her neck as she reached back and put her hand as far down his pants as she could. He held her against the fridge displacing all the pictures, magnets and notes and between kisses on her neck he whispered "You fucking whore." [ continue ]
Mar. 9th, 2011239 views0 Comments

meh nuts
I have to start this by asking why these seems to be a group of men out there who are so incredibly dumb they ruin life for damn near everyone else? You know the morons I'm talking about, they hang fake testicles from their trailer hitch, and of course drive big trucks. Now I have seen these on some tiny Chevette type cars too which really push the envelope of dumb based on what I'm about to tear into but it simply boggles the mind that people see this as a good idea for any purpose. [ continue ]
Mar. 7th, 2011202 views0 Comments

Comedy Network where the only joke is their website!
So tonight a friend is asking me about an episode of South Park and I quickly link her to the show, but wait! I'm sure you've seen the fucking notice; "We're sorry but the selected video can not be displayed in your world region." FUCK...YOU! So if you don't know m0dw3rks is in Canada and these bullshit limits on who knows what legal copyright idiocy is all too familiar to us. So most people can watch SouthPark online, but nooo not fucking us! Now you might say, "Hold on man, SouthPark is now available on the Comedy Network website." Wow, you're sharp, I mean you read the title of this article didn't you? So here we go... [ continue ]
Mar. 5th, 2011246 views0 Comments

Ulcerate - The Destroyers Of All
Ulcerate just released "The Destroyers Of All" and while I heard it before its street date I've put off writing about it. The delay is in part because I've suffered a major "strokegasm" when I heard it and only a few days ago was I able to feel my fingers and toes and regain consciousness. If you love Metal you should be fucking ashamed of yourself if you haven't heard this album. [ continue ]
Mar. 4th, 2011258 views0 Comments

TV ...more useless than ever!
So I've not had "TV" for years, so my box set collection is pretty decent. Recently some huge life changes have ended me in a situation where...wait for it...I have Cable TV. So big deal right? Most people think you're fucked in the head without TV but typically I'm not a fan and while I have a few shows I like they test my patience at the same time. Enter the worst thing since the commercial, the re-cap! [ continue ]
Mar. 3rd, 2011264 views0 Comments

The Last Words of Bill Zeller
I have the urge to declare my sanity and justify my actions, but I assume I'll never be able to convince anyone that this was the right decision. Maybe it's true that anyone who does this is insane by definition, but I can at least explain my reasoning. I considered not writing any of this because of how personal it is, but I like tying up loose ends and don't want people to wonder why I did this. Since I've never spoken to anyone about what happened to me, people would likely draw the wrong conclusions. [ continue ]
Jan. 7th, 2011269 views0 Comments

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